“I am a late sizzler.” That’s what I wrote in my book “Sizzling at Seventy”. Now I believe that I have proved that not only can you sizzle, you can absolutely thrive at seventy-five. I thought my life was wonderful at seventy and made a smug statement in my book that, as a reformed victim, I felt that I could cope with anything life threw at me. Well, life decided to check me out and threw me the biggest curve ball of all.
Following on from some unwise relationship choices, in my early sixties I met the love of my life and I thought I had found my ‘happy-ever-after’. We had a wonderful, enriching marriage and he was the icing on the cake for someone who had worked hard to crawl out of victimhood and kick some pretty impressive goals. I had no idea what lay ahead.
I became a teacher because I hated every day of my school life and wanted to prove that education can be enjoyable for everyone if individual differences are acknowledged. The school system never suited me and I was excited in my forties, to be given a year on full pay to go to university, which added to my qualifications in special education. This was my opportunity to assist teachers to bring out the best in students who, like me, didn’t fit the system. I’d be lying if I said that everything I tried was a success, but I was able to implement many successful breakthroughs. Always driven by my passion, it was during this time that I wrote a published series called, “Thinking Sideways”, which was inspired by Howard Gardner’s notion of different intelligences. Other published works reflected strategies to help students get the most out of language. I was on a roll, but hadn’t been prepared for the resistance I encountered along the way. If I had only had the confidence afforded to me now, I would not have let others push me down because I now know that I was on the right track. There were some fabulous experiences in education but after a particularly nasty spate of bullying, I retired from education at the age of fifty-five to begin the next important journey.
I took on a business partner and created a Registered Training Organisation, Traill Blaze Communications. I thought that as an educational consultant, I had so much experience in training, but of course, once again there were many challenges. I have no regrets and am so grateful for the steep learning curve. My thirst for learning stood me in good stead and I undertook many courses in my desire to serve clients. Becoming accredited in all Human Synergistics diagnostic tools was a useful ploy and we managed to build up a strong clientele. I learnt how to ‘fake it till you make it’, but, sometimes I found it difficult. An early contract we had with an engineering company, proved to be challenging. I overheard a rather arrogant man say, “Women are allowed to be smart as long as they are ugly.” Apparently, I wasn’t ugly enough! It just made me more resolute to do my absolute best.
Early on I began to realise that although our clients asked for consultation, most of which entailed common sense answers, it wasn’t sustainable. Instead of being told what to do, I realised they needed coaching to make their own decisions. This lead me to undertake several coaching courses, the most valuable being the Graduate Diploma of Ontological Coaching, which was both personally and professionally life changing. My business partner had long moved away and I went on alone, apart from two years as a director in a training college.
There were some personal traumas, but once again, I am so grateful that I became stronger and at last stepped into my true self. I was no longer a victim and began to believe that I had something to offer the world. This made such a difference because, where previously I had compromised in relationships, I now felt good enough to attract something better. In fact, by this time I didn’t need anybody in my life, I was happy on my own. Then I met my lovely Mick. I talk about the miracle of that in my book. At the end of the book he was very much alive and my life was amazing. Six months later he was taken with a melanoma and brain tumour. I was unprepared, not only for the grief of losing my beloved, who had inspired me to write the book, but I reeled from the behaviour of some who dealt with his death in unexpected ways which impacted mightily on my mental health. I have learned so much from the next terrible eighteen months and see them as valuable.
So much has happened since then. I feel I have much to offer in assisting women in their search for wholeness and I love this work. I love to speak, I love to coach and I love to write. How lucky I am to be able to have the opportunity to do all three. I truly believe, with all my experience, that once you have your vision, you do all you can, and then watch the miracles happen. I had no idea that life could be so fabulous and I know that it is absolutely possible to thrive at seventy-five. It is never too late to find your ‘fabulous’.
About the Author
Alongside a successful career as an educational consultant, author, and training director of a leading vocational college, Lyn has been in demand as a management consultant since 1997, specialising in executive coaching, culture analysis and customised training. More recently she works one on one with her intuitive coaching practices which include regression therapy and ontological (way of being) strategies. Her book, “Sizzling at Seventy – Victim to Victorious” has proved to be helpful to many and is being republished. It is available on Amazon or on Lyn’s website.
Lyn’s warm and perceptive personality allows her to easily engage and encourage people. Her passion and humour are infectious, allowing others to feel readily at ease. She is available for one on one coaching, group coaching and speaking.